A Quick Truth or Dare (sort of)
by FictitiousFriend
Summary: A Question is asked, tangents are gone off onto, and Remus Lupin ends up in Professor McGonagall's office having a very embarrassing conversation about what is and isn't appropriate to do in the Great Hall.


**A Quick Truth or Dare**

 **By: The Marauders**

A/N: Well, this happened. I'm not entirely sure why, or if it even makes sense, but you know, enjoy! (P.S. This isn't actually a whole Truth or Dare game, more like one truth that doesn't even get answered, but whatever. I hope you like it!)

 ** **Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING. IF I DID OWN THESE AMAZING CHARACTERS (and wasn't a crap writer person thingy), THEN I WOULD HAVE ALREADY WRITTEN ABOUT A THOUSAND MORE BOOKS ABOUT THEM. SPEAKING OF WHICH, GET ON THAT J.K!****

 _Characters_ _:_

 _Remus Lupin (From HP By JKR)_

 _Sirius Black (HP/JKR)_

 _James Potter (HP/JKR)_

 _Peter Pettigrew (HP/JKR)_

 _Lily Evans (HP/JKR)_

 _**Marlene Price (From TLAT*)_

 _**Donna Shacklebolt (From TLAT)_

 _**Mary Macdonald (From TLAT)_

 _Minerva McGonagall (HP/JKR)_

 _***Natalie Lupin_

 _*_ TLAT: The Life and Times, a Harry Potter, Marauder's era fanfiction

**If you haven't read TLAT, these are just some of the other gryffindor girls in the Marauders' year (because making up new characters is too hard to do at midnight and I'm lazy).

***Remus Lupin's made up sister who coincidentally has the same name as my sister... Wow, I'm so creative.

"Okay, Remus, truth or dare?" Asked Lily

"Ummm, truth," answered Remus.

"Aw, c'mon Moony, you're no fun," complained Sirius.

"Oh! That's my question. What do those nicknames mean? It's been bugging me since fifth year. I mean really, Moony? Wormtail? Where did you guys come up with these?" Mary asked.

The four boys exchanged uneasy looks before Sirius and James jumped onto Remus, clapping their hands over his mouth just as he was about to talk, and knocking him over.

"NO! Don't answer it, Moony!" Yelled Sirius right into Remus' ear.

"Would you two idiots get OFF ME!" Remus yelled as pushed the aforementioned idiots off of him and into a pile on the floor. "Merlin! I was going to say, before I was ambushed by a couple of morons," Remus said the last part with a pointed look at Messrs. Padfoot and Prongs, "That I can't tell you. It's a secret strictly for Marauder ears."

"Well, that's kinda the point of the game, Lupin," Donna pointed out.

"Why can't you tell us?" asked Lily

"Well, there are many reasons for that. The second reason though, would have to be that the reasoning behind at least three of them is rather illegal." Remus answered.

"Illegal, how so?"

"Not like murder illegal," Remus assured the group, "We've never murdered anyone."

"I'm sure your sister would have to disagree with you on that one, Remus" Peter said, hiding a smirk.

"Oh, yeah. Natalie would disagree very strongly indeed. So would Francis probably, come to think of it. Too bad he can't talk after he was viciously killed by Sirius." Added James. Lily raised her eyebrows at Sirius, whom everyone now had their eyes trained on.

"Francis couldn't talk before he died either," said Sirius shooting a glare at Peter and James, "Seeing as how he was A FISH. And it was accident! I got her two more fish after anyway."

"Well as she so forcefully reminded you, Francis simply cannot be replaced. He was a very special fish," Remus said, also burying a grin.

"Can you finish please? I would very much like to know what sort of illicit activities these four get up to in their spare time." Donna said with a pointed look, ending the previous conversation.

"Oh, curious, aren't you Shack?" Sirius asked, raising his eyebrows ridiculously, which caused Donna (Shack, as in Shacklebolt) to scowl at him.

"Anyway, as I was saying, not the murder sort of illegal. More like… secretly owning and caring for a dragon." Remus finished, causing everyone to look at him again.

"We haven't actually got a dragon, it was just an example." Remus added quickly, assuaging the distressed glances that were shot at him.

"That's not to say we've never have done that," James added quickly.

"Well we haven't," Remus shot back, "That was Hagrid's technically, not ours."

"Then why were we the ones who had to feed it!" Sirius said.

"Well, that's because some dolt volunteered us for it," Remus said through gritted teeth.

"Well, it was fun, wasn't it?" Sirius, now grinning as that particular memory returned to him.

"You're not the one who still has a scar from it," James mumbled.

"Yeah, well that was your own fault, wasn't it. You're the one who tried to fit it into a dress and stockings-"

"MOVING ON!" A red faced James interrupted Sirius, who was grinning like a cheshire cat.

The other occupants of the room broke into a chorus of laughter, and shared looks clearly expressing that they thought the four boys to be in desperate need of some serious (pun intended) medical attention.

"You guys are mental," Marlene said, shaking her head and laughing.

"Hey, you asked," James said, also grinning now.

"Actually," Interrupted Lily, "She asked about the names. Not that I didn't enjoy this little show, but we still haven't gotten an answer."

"Well, my dearest flower, I'm afraid that these mad dragon stories are the best you're gonna get." Sirius told Lily, with a faux somber expression

"We'll get it out of you someday." Mary said

"Of that, I have no doubt."

"Well if you're not going to answer Lupin, you need to do the penalty." Said Donna

"Yeah, yeah, I know." He sighed

And that's how Remus Lupin ended up in Professor McGonagall's office the next day, with the other seven snickering outside the door, and having a very embarrassing conversation about what was and wasn't appropriate to do in the Great Hall. As he learned, coming in naked (barring a pair of boxer briefs) and painted in red and gold, and then proceeding to stand on the table and dance the macarena, was not appropriate.


End file.
